Have you ever caught yourself thinking, “Who am I to have this?” Maybe it was when someone complimented you, when a big opportunity landed in your lap, or even when you eyed that cozy, slightly-too-expensive sweater that made you feel like the best version of yourself. If so, you’ve met one of the most sneaky saboteurs of happiness: low deservability.

There are times in life when just making it through the day feels like a victory. Bills, work, relationships, health challenges, grief, uncertainty, sometimes the weight of it all leaves us in a state of survival. We get up, go through the motions, check the boxes, and collapse into bed only to start again tomorrow. Survival mode is not a failure; it’s often a necessary response to hardship. It keeps us afloat when waters are rough.

Sometimes it feels like no matter how much we do, it’s never quite enough. We’re surrounded by messages that imply our worth depends on how much we accomplish, how we look, or how well we fit in. We chase goals, compare ourselves to others, and often forget to ask one simple question: How am I treating myself through it all? This is where self-love comes in.